Tuesday, September 11, 2012

That's what I remember

Lots of people will give you great and moving tributes to those who died on 9/11/2001.  Lots of tributes. And me? I remember the feeling of emptiness, helplessness and horror as we saw what unfolded that day.
I start work at 8, so I was in by 7:45 doing my thing.  Dave and I carpooled and he needed to be across town by 8, so I got dropped off early.  As I slipped in the front door, my boss Jeff came out of his office directly across from my cubicle, "A plane just hit the World Trade Center." he says incredulously.  I was thinking Cessna with a student pilot.. small plane got out of control thing.  Jeff walks back into his office.

The next time he RUNS out of his office.  "Another plane just hit the other tower!" he says.  My first words were, "Terrorist Attack?" He nods and says, "Seems so." Now as the day unfolds, not much work is done.  We had radios dialed into whatever we could. I scan for any type of info online as the IT Gods would allow and find a weather webcam across the bay in Jersey that faces the World Trade center.  It updates every 10 minutes, so I see everything sporadically.

Then I look down and realize that I cannot go anywhere but home after work.  You see, I love the Middle Eastern dresses.  The style and embroidery are elegant and on those days when you really don't want to wear much, an elegantly embroidered caftan works. And that day, I had just pulled out of the box sent from some Ebay dude, a maroon caftan with gold embroidery done in the style of Egyptian Arabic Caftans. I am so totally screwed! Any place I would have thought to go to like the grocery store...nah.  People are just off the wall freaked about what they are hearing.  

I did eventually get rid of the dress.  I wore it once: that day and never wore it again.  Bad mojo.

My first time watching the 2nd airplane hit the tower was when I went to pick up our son Alex. The video was replaying on tv.  My only word was, "Shit!" it was just so....surreal.  We discussed my upcoming workshop on learning to spin when we got home.  I was scheduled to go to Black River Falls and take classes on learning how to spin about a week later.  My decision was to go.  As I said, "What are the terrorists going to do, start bombing cows? There's nothing worth bombing in Wisconsin."

Sitting across from my Father In Law, Ed the next morning eating breakfast, he asks, 'does this whole thing make you nervous?" And I think about it, "Not really." I say.  We're in flyover country, surrounded by hay fields and cows. We're not a target.   Only about a week later they were giving news updates about the rescue and recovery efforts when it just hit me: 3000 people dead in one day... for no reason. Absolutely no reason.

I just cried. 

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